Abby has never,ever been a great sleeper but where did this baby go who at least tried to sleep?
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
What is sleep?
After a night like last night for which there are no words, I am asking for advice. WHY DOESN'T ABBY SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT?!?!? She was starting to do really well with sleeping through the night before we moved in January and I think she has slept through the night maybe four times since then. She wakes up wimpering and crying if her diaper is wet and won't calm down until it's changed. She can go for over an hour asking for a change. If she doesn't get at least one bottle during the night we have to listen to her sobbing and screaming. I try to just ignore her but it never works. And, I often wake up super hungry in the middle of the night, so I feel bad when she does the same and I ignore it. Any advice?
Abby has never,ever been a great sleeper but where did this baby go who at least tried to sleep?
Abby has never,ever been a great sleeper but where did this baby go who at least tried to sleep?
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Man if you ever find something that works let me know too! I don't want to make you feel hopeless, but Jack STILL doesn't sleep through the night and he will be 2 in July. He was for a while just like your little sweetheart, and then he had surgery and is back to waking up once in the night. I feel lucky that most times now days its around 5 in the morning and I can get him to go back to sleep till 7 or 8 with a bottle. I feel lucky that we get maybe 4 days out of the week that he will sleep all the way through.
ReplyDeleteI have always been fine with sleep training and letting him cry it out for a week or so, but when your child is sick or has had surgery its just so hard to refuse them care. We are getting back on the sleep training thing probably next week after our visitors are gone.
We get ear plugs and will take turns listening or watching the clock. Before we are even go to bed, that way we aren't trying to discuss or decide half asleep, we set a specific amount of time that we will allow him to cry before we try to do any one thing. Then we will determine if what we do after that amount of time will be just some words of comfort, a bottle, or whatever. Also we started buying night diapers which also seemed to help since he would be leaking out regular ones. Then beyond that I just prayed and prayed that he would sleep through the night, or if he woke up I lay in bed praying he would get himself back to sleep.
There are some people that really think that if your child is waking up there is a reason. I think that is the case sometimes, but I also think it can become habit for them, especially if you notice it is at the same time every night. Sorry I can't be of more help. Good Luck!
Yeah...I hear you! Actually Claire was a wonderful sleeper....until we got a toddler bed. Now she can come get us. I guess when she was in her crib she would wake up, but just go back to sleep because she knew we weren't going to get her. When we let her cry it out I thought it was going to be horrible, but it only took her 2 days to learn. HOWEVER, I think it's harder to do that when they scream for more than 30 minutes at a time. I know that's not advice at all...just empathy.
ReplyDeleteOne thing that has worked for me though is that I try to give my kids (and myself) something to eat right before bed because I have that same hunger problem. I always wake up if I'm hungry. If I"m fed and Claire is full, she always sleeps better during the night and we can usually make it all night if she's had a really good dinner. Even the baby sleeps longer on a full stomach. Maybe that could work? We do snacks before bed if dinner was a downer for her.
I'm sorry! I hope you figure out something soon! I think that's why God created nap time and designed for mom's to stay home to get them. :)
I'm sorry you are going through this Melody. Hank has a rough time each time he is sick and then it takes a couple days to remind him that sleep time is sleep time. One thing we have always made sure to do with him is not get him out of the crib or bassinet or whatever he's sleeping in once he's been put in. We let him whine and cry for a while and hope for self-soothing but if he doesn't, we go in and talk to him in his crib. Now that he's older we can do some legitimate explaining. We ask him what's going on and then talk to him about bed time. I know the whole talking thing sounds silly, but kids really respond to communication and I don't think it's silly at all to talk to them like a human that understands.
ReplyDeleteMaking sure her belly is full is dang important too. Hank always has a rougher night when he didn't do as well with dinner. Does Abby have something to soothe her? A favorite blanket or toy that is always in her bed with her? Hank has a crocheted blanket that he will rub or pull over his face to calm himself.
I hope some of this is helpful! Maybe read Baby Wise. We used a lot of principles from that book and Hank has maintained a pretty solid love, appreciation, and understanding of sleep.
Abby has never really developed a security object. She used to be attached to her pacifier but she's moving out of that phase. I'll have to try talking to her and letting her know I'm there while she cries it out.
DeleteI don't know if I've just been lucky to have a good sleeper, but a friend suggested a book called Sleep Easy Solution, and it really helped. My boy is only 2.5 months, but he averages 6-8 hours lately. Soo nice! Like I said, my lil guy may being really nice to me, but it never hurts to try. It talks about naps too, and how to put them down in bed and put themselves to sleep. Let me know how it goes if you read it. Good Luck.
ReplyDeleteThe funny thing about Abby is that she takes great naps! I put her down and she usually goes right to sleep or babbles and plays until she falls asleep. It's just night time that she has problems.
ReplyDeleteIs she getting to much nap time? I wish I could help! We are in the middle of the cry it out thing and it is working GREAT for us. I heard there is a "magic window" to sleep train between 6 and 8 months. Not that that helps you any. I hope she learns to sleep SOON!
DeleteI don't think she's getting too much nap time. She only sleeps 2-3 hours during the day. Sometimes it's one nap and sometimes it's two naps.
DeleteWith Kyle he was just a good sleeper and still is. He was sleeping threw the night at 6 weeks. Now with Sariah she wakes up once sometimes twice a night. Being that they share a room I can't just let her CIO for any length of time because she will wake up Kyle. She also only takes 1hr naps during the day and she is generally an active baby as is. What I do know is that a move can sometimes cause problem and it takes young children to get back into the swing of things. At first when we moved back to Ohio Kyle would wake up, but after a few weeks or longer he got back to his normal schedule. Back with Sariah. I am slowly trying to ween her off of her midnight bottle but taking it down 2ozs a week. I hope that might help as she won't wake up hungry in the middle of the night.
ReplyDeleteI really wish I could give you words of wisdom, but I wish you and Scott the best. And if you find something that works let me know.
We happen to be "sleep training" Sam right now. He is also a great napper (so much so that we wake him from naps so that he'll sleep better at night), but would wake up constantly at night - some nights every 2-3 hours at 5 months! It just became a really bad habit and got increasingly worse. Sleep training is one of those things that is hard to do but is worth the benefits. I worried that they were waking up hungry but knowing that they had slept through the night in the past reassured me.
ReplyDeleteEveryone has their own way of doing it but this is what we've done. When they wake up at night (the first night they cry it out) I will stay in the room but not pick them up. Every 10 minutes I'll pat their back for a few moments. I want them to know that I'm still there, but won't pick them up. Every kid is different. Sam cried hard for a good hour the first day (and still woke up several more times that night). Shayla cried (more like screamed bloody murder) the first 3 HOURS and finally fell asleep leaning onto her crib (stubborn child), but didn't wake up anymore that night. Each night becomes much easier. For Shayla she cried 30 minutes the 2nd night and 5 the 3rd night and slept like a champ from then on. Sam is learning a little more slowly - we are on day six but we're down to waking up about once and crying less than 30 minutes. Each kid is so different. If Shayla cries out in the night we still always go to check on her but if nothing seems wrong or she doesn't seem sick then we quickly pat her back, fix her blankie and walk out.
It literally hurts my heart to hear them cry and goes against all my instincts to not pick them up. But when it's done we are so glad we did. There's nothing like a good night's rest. It helps me to be a better mom! Good luck with whatever you decide to do!